Questions to Ask Before You Get Married

I'm going to guess that unless you're just a wedding enthusiast like me, you've already decided you're going to get married. Congratulations! If you're well into the wedding planning process, you've probably already thought a lot about married life. If you've only just gotten engaged, you may be wondering just what being married will be like. The short answer is that it will more than likely be a lot like partnered life...just a bit more intense.

Why? Because your spouse's joys are your joys, their problems are your problems, and you have no choice but to face the world together. No ifs, ands, or buts! Being that this is the case, you should definitely prepare yourself for married life before tying the knot. Here are just some of the factors you need to consider:

Your attitudes about compromise
You must have the ability to compromise with your spouse because you're not always going to agree on everything. Compromising with each other is essential, as those who are unwilling to compromise will create serious issues.

Your attitudes about money
Money is vital to gratify all your family needs. Make sure you and your spouse have similar ideas about spending and saving. Before getting hitched, consider the costs of the wedding that you wish to have and how you will be able to afford to have it. This does not mean that you shouldn't get married if you don't have the average $30,000 -- it just means that you may need to have a smaller wedding. Make sure that you are emotionally and financially prepared to meet the financial demands that you may incur after you get married, e.g., buying a house, raising children, medical emergencies, etc.

Your attitudes about decorum
From here on in, you have to consider your spouse when making decisions, whether you're choosing between drapes or considering changing careers. Respect your spouse enough to never force them to do anything that goes against their moral, personal, or professional values. While you are a couple, your spouse is an autonomous human being.

Your attitudes about religion
If you are very religious, you shouldn't feel the need to give that up for your spouse. Conversely, if you are not religious, you shouldn't feel obligated to adopt their faith. However, you should respect that your spouse is or is not religious, and encourage them in their religious endeavors.

Good communication
This is absolutely essential! Be gentle with your spouse even when you disagree and always be willing to listen to their side of things. You may be surprised to find that they are often right. Remember that there are ups and downs in every relationship. You just have to be able to talk things out sanely and overcome the hurdles that are thrown at you.


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