Black Bridesmaids Dresses

We here at Smart Wedding planning despair for those brides who have to hear over and over again how "a wedding is not a funeral" and "isn't that a little morbid?" when they choose to dress their bridal attendants in black dresses. Black bridesmaids dresses have traditionally not been in vogue because black was seen as being inappropriate for the occasion. That, however, has changed in recent years, leading to an upswing in the number of black bridesmaids dresses for sale in bridal salons.

If your wedding colors include black -- and don't be afraid to choose a wedding color scheme that includes it -- you will soon discover that there are benefits to dressing your bridesmaids in black. The little black dress never goes out of style, which means that your bridesmaids will likely be able to wear the dress you have chosen again in the future. Black is slimming, and we've yet to meet a bridesmaid who wouldn't like to appear just a tad skinnier. Black also looks good on many complexions so you don't have to worry about one of your gals looking greenish at the altar.

Are there downsides to choosing black bridesmaids dresses? Well, yes. Older and more traditional wedding guests may wonder just what your color choice means, even though it likely means nothing at all. Expect to hear from friends and family that Aunt So-and-So said your ceremony looked like a funeral. But we say ignore the haters! Black is a chic and elegant choice for bridesmaids dresses, and it doesn't look like it will be going away any time soon.


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Best Man's Toast

Ah, the best man's toast. They can be absolutely lovely -- so moving that there's not a dry eye in the house. They can also be excruciating to sit through, especially if the best man has had one too many glasses of champagne punch. If you're worried that your man's best man will give a toast that falls into the latter camp, pass this best man's toast how-to onto him.

First off, the most beautiful sentiment you can express is the positive change you've seen in the couple since they met. If you're having trouble coming up with the right words, ask yourself how the groom has grown and evolved since meeting his future wife. How has he changed overall since you first met him? If you were kids together, choose an anecdote from your youth to share.

When you think about adding humor, remember that everyone has a different idea about what's funny and what isn't. Keep in mind that you are speaking to a wide demographic and some people will take what you say very seriously. It's best to always remain proper and gracious. Don't share any embarrassing stories or talk about sex.

But be yourself. Don't look for a very formal script from a book if you aren't a formal person. Make sure your toast sounds like you. There are lots of ways to personalize your toast to keep the audience engaged.

Above all, remember to keep your toast very, very short. When you're done toasting, thank the audience for coming even though you aren't the host. Being the best man, you had a vested interest in your good friend's wedding turning out perfectly, so you're well within your rights to do so.

(By the way, if the maid-of-honor is giving a toast, these guidelines will apply to her as well!)


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Bridesmaids Gift Suggestions

Shopping for bridesmaids gifts and groomsmen gifts can be one of the most harrowing parts of wedding planning. Why? Because it's usually left until the very last minute and there are a lot of expectations attached to what would otherwise be a perfectly ordinary present. To make the whole process less stressful, give yourself plenty of time to shop for bridesmaids gifts and think about what your bridesmaids would really like. Don't worry about what the bridal magazines say you should get!

Still stymied? We have some tips that will help you pick out the best bridesmaids gifts:

Don't worry about price, i.e., do not be concerned that what you're buying costs too much (if you can afford it) or costs too little. An expensive bridesmaids gift does not necessarily mean a great one! You do not need to prove your love to your bridesmaids by getting them something that cost you a lot of money -- you should buy them something that shows that you care.

One idea is to get your bridesmaids some stationary. Stationary is not expensive, but is something that is useful and everyone can use. Another idea is getting each bridesmaid their wedding day jewelry. If you are really tight on cash, you can always write them a personal thank you note. Just remember that you do not need to buy the love of your bridesmaids with your gift.

Remember to keep it tasteful if you do go the 'thank you card' route. Those cards that say "Maybe next time it will be you, but probably not" or "You don't look good in white anyway" get old real fast. And steer clear of gag bridesmaid gifts unless you know for sure that your bridesmaids will really appreciate it.

The bridesmaid gift is part of your wedding and you want it to be tasteful and appropriate to the occasion. Remember, however, that each of your bridesmaids is an individual, and they may not appreciate the same things. One might love a gag gift, while another would much rather have a heartfelt thank you.


Click to shop for the perfect bridesmaids gifts or beautiful bridal jewelry

Advice for Brides / Advice for Bridesmaids

When it comes time to choose the bridesmaids' dresses, many brides choke. Sure, the bride-to-be knows what she wants and what she likes, but how can she translate that into dresses for bridesmaids of different shapes, sizes, and styles? When it comes to bridesmaids' dresses, compromise is the key. It's the bride's wedding, so she ultimately has the final say when it comes to what her wedding attendants will be wearing. At the same time, bridesmaids shouldn't let themselves be suckered into wearing hot pink polyester!

We've compiled a shortlist of advice for brides and advice for bridesmaids that will help stave off conflicts over dresses and hopefully ensure that everyone is happy with what they are wearing when the wedding day rolls around.

Brides:
When selecting your bridesmaids' dresses, it is always best to try to keep your bridesmaids' tastes in mind. As the bride, when you look back on your wedding, you probably won't care all that much about what your bridesmaid dresses looked like. Their budgets, personalities, shapes, sizes and opinions should all be factored in to your decision. Try not to forget that the reason they are standing up in your wedding is because they are the ones that have been there for you in your life. You don't want to embarrass them or make them uncomfortable just for your happiness. Although some dresses are more reusable than others, eventually all styles go out of fashion. However, your friends and family never will go out of style and will always be needed.

Bridesmaids:
As a bridesmaid, try to be flexible and be willing to compromise to a certain extent. This is your dear friend's or relative's special day and you want her to be happy. Don't let a dress that you may only wear for one day get in the way of a long-time friendship that will hopefully last a lifetime. If you really don't like the dress, take it to a local consignment store soon after the wedding while it is still in style. Otherwise you can donate it to a local charity. Someone else out there will love the dress and be thrilled to get a bargain. Then you will have made another person happy, too!


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Bridal Shower Invitations

Maids-of-honors and bridesmaids, this post is for you. If you're the bride-to-be, feel free to e-mail your best gal pals a link to the blog because it's their job (not yours) to plan your bridal shower. Once the hostess knows when and where the bridal shower will be, and the theme if any, it's time for her to think about the shower invitations. We've often been asked what the maid-of-honor or bridesmaids should include on the invitation. Here's a short list of necessary info that will help you create a basic bridal shower invitation:

• The date, time, and length of the wedding shower

• The address and specific location of the party

• The name of the bride, and the correct spelling of the groom's full name

• The intended shower guests, listed by name

• The location of the couple's wedding gift registry or registries

• Directions or even a map to the party venue

• The theme, if it is to be a themed wedding shower

• Indicate whether cocktails and snacks, tea and cake, or a full meal will be served

• In the case of a potluck party, suggest dishes guests can bring

• What guests should wear, if this is appropriate

• RSVP information, and an RSVP deadline

That's it, unless you want to include other information on your bridal shower invitations. If you're planning a bridal shower that will have a specific theme, consider choosing invitations that highlight that theme, e.g., invitations with a vintage kitchen pattern for a kitchen shower. Remember, however, that how your bridal shower invitations look is less important than ensuring that everyone has a good time. If guests enjoy themselves, they'll forgive almost any breach in etiquette!

Click to shop for bridal shower favors or to read more about bridal shower etiquette

Wedding Shower Ideas

Hey, brides! This post is for your maid-of-honor and your bridesmaids, so pass it along to them via e-mail when they're not looking so they have plenty of wedding shower ideas to work with when they're planning your pre-wedding bash! Remember that you, the bride, shouldn't have any part in planning your bridal shower, but that doesn't mean you can't drop all kinds of hints about the shower you might like to have.

Here are three bridal shower ideas to get you started:

The most popular wedding shower idea is the kitchen shower, and it's really the most practical as well. After all, no one can have too many kitchen utensils or appliances, and there is also a host of nice little gourmet treats that the bride may love. If, however, the bride-t0-be has been living on her own for 10 years, it's likely that she has everything she needs for the kitchen. Check with her before planning this kind of shower.

A personal shower is also nice, with everyone giving the bride a gift of lingerie or accessories such as inexpensive jewelry. Should you decide to choose to include lingerie in the gift list you give to guests, please be sure that your friend will enjoy opening packages of undies and teddies in front of her relatives. Sometimes bridal showers involving lingerie are best kept 'friends only.'

Alternately, call a local day spa and ask if you can book an afternoon for pedicures and manicures for the whole crew. No cake, no boring gift-opening sessions, and no awkward small talk. You can all chat and giggle and feel spoiled, then duck out for a drink and dinner. No muss, no fuss, no clean-up or decorating for you. It's perfect for busy bridesmaids.

Have fun!

Click to learn more about planning a wedding shower